Ten Years Ago Today, We Spoke For The First Time

This is the story of how James and I met.  We used to tell people it was in a bookstore.

Which is kind of-sort of true.  But not really.

What happened was this:

One day in the beginning of September, I was bored and checking out this witchy website, Witchvox.com. I was looking for other witches in Providence, RI. I’d never met anyone besides Mich- And I really wanted to make some friends that shared my beliefs. So I listed myself, and started looking through the listings for people that didn’t seem TOO weird- and then I saw this guy’s profile.   Since he was in my town, I bit the bullet and emailed him.   He responded- Just a hello, and we began to chat through messages and the occasional IM.

So we sent emails back and forth for a while.  I thought he was intelligent and funny so I did something that probably seems stupid- because I felt pretty safe  in my house with five roommates I gave him my home phone number.

Pretty soon we were talking on the phone every day.  At the end of that September my mom’s boyfriend tried to kill her. The police came and took him away, but I was freaking out.  And this guy who I’d never met- offered to come over and take care of my mom and me  in case her boyfriend came back. I said no. A new guy hanging around after all that suddenly seemed scary.  We talked a few more times over the next few days, and then it was time for him to go back to home.

He left October 1, 2001 and called me that same day- from England. He missed me and wanted to say hello. We talked for a while and then he said good bye and that he probably wouldn’t be calling me again. I was sad because I knew I would miss our conversations. It was nice talking to someone so smart and funny.   And hey- That accent was a killer!

He called a few days later and we talked for hours and hours.  After that he started calling every few days- and then it became every night at seven (my time) when he got home from the pub he was working in.  Each time we’d talk for HOURS- usually until I fell asleep.

One night, a few weeks later, he told me he was falling in love with me.

I was falling for him too- and at this point, I was getting really nervous (mind you, we’d never seen each other not even in pictures) and I was FAT.  I was afraid he wouldn’t find me attractive. How could anyone love me? I just knew I was going to lose him if we ever met in person. Not that it was likely, since he was so far away.

But I told him I was fat.

He said it didn’t matter.

I told him I was a troll.

He said it didn’t matter.

Originally, he wasn’t coming back here at all.  Then on Samhain he told me he would be back after the new year.  Then it was “I’m coming back after Yule.”  Then it was “I’m coming back the beginning of December.”  Then he called to tell me he’d be here for Thanksgiving.

I was FREAKING OUT by this point. Here was this wonderful, funny, smart, romantic man- complete with sexy foreign accent and he was going to fly across the ocean to be with fat, ugly, single mom me. Not going to be a fairytale ending there- No way-no how.

He called me on a Wednesday night and said:

“You know I love you right?’

“Yeah, why?” I reply. Ah, such eloquence.

“And you love me?”

“Yes…. Why? What did you do?”

“Promise me you won’t freak out?” He knows me so well already.

“No… This sounds like something that will probably make me freak out… But tell me anyway.” I say.

“I booked my flight.”

silence from me

“I’ll be there on Sunday.”

I promptly proceeded to freak out. Every time I thought about him coming here for me I would feel sick. I was terrified and excited and scared and worried and beside myself with nervousness.  I tried sending him a pic so he would know what he was getting into- But he refused to look at it.

Sunday arrived: Nov 18th, 2001.

I made my friend Suzanne come with me to the bookstore I was supposed to meet him in. We pretended it was for safety’s sake, but really I needed the moral support.  We found a table, not far from where I was supposed to meet him.  When he came in I knew it was him right away.  He had that lost look people get when they are looking for someone.   He was tall and well-dressed, and I was a little bit intimidated by his shaved head and leather jacket.  I also thought he was hot!

I was so scared, and I couldn’t stop trembling. I walked up behind him and said hello in this sickeningly shaky voice. He turned around, smiled, and tried to hug me. I sort of leaned against him, smelled his cologne and practically ran back to my seat. I avoided eye contact, staring down at the table-So afraid to see disappointment.

We sat for a bit and chatted.  I felt incredibly awkward and unsure.

And then he gave me two presents. A silver pentacle on a fine chain he had bought me to replace one I had lost a few weeks before, and his return ticket. He placed it on the table in front of me.  And I just stared at it, knowing it meant he had no intention of going home.  And then I tore it into little pieces- which I still have.  We ditched Suzie Q and spent the night walking around the city.

We’ve been together ever since. We married a year later on September 22nd, 2002. Then came Patrick and Willow and Cooper.

That is how I met my James.